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How best to react to the latest news on the Los Angeles Rams? Easy: with complete abandon and logical recklessness. That's how the veterans do it. Said latest news: that massive offseason acquisition Myles Garrett has fouled his knee, failed to will it healthy again, and now will have surgery that will take out all of September and a chunk of October as well. Garrett was the big swing of the summer, but the fact that it was the Rams that took it is no surprise. General manager Les Snead and head coach Sean McVay love acquisitional bat speed more than nearly any team not named Real Madrid or Barcelona, and between Garrett and veteran ace in the hole Aaron Donald, they surely constructed the most unsettling defensive front since their own Fearsome Foursome six decades ago. In fact, they also apparently took another shot at cornering the pass-rush market by making a strenuous run at Las Vegas Raiders designated menace Maxx Crosby, one which failed in significant part because Crosby decided in the wake of his abortive trade to Baltimore that he wanted against all odds to remain a Raider, a choice we presume he will rue for the next six decades or so.

West Sacramento Athletics manager Mark Kotsay knew the drill from months of exercising it. Another game was on fire, and he needed someone who could at least let it burn itself out, so he went to Carlos Cortes in the bottom of the eighth inning, the bases loaded with Mariners and four runs already in. And Cortes did his duty Saturday, inducing Victor Robles to fly out modestly to right field to end the inning. Seattle still led, 16-1, but Cortes did the required work. Then he went out again for the ninth because it was still 16-1 and the A's didn't really need him to be the left fielder any more. And, predictably, he got kicked around the lot because that's what left fielders asked to pitch tend to do. He walked Cal Raleigh. Then he walked Julio Rodriguez. Then he walked Brock Rodden. Then he gave up a two-run single to Cole Young and a sacrifice fly to Michael Arroyo. Eventually he did get out of the inning, though, because Carlos Cortes does the required work, even if it takes a bit. This was his ninth appearance as a pitcher this year, which truly is remarkable given that he is indeed an outfielder by trade. But the A's get beaten by a lot a lot. In his nine appearances, Cortes has entered games in which they trailed at the time by an aggregate score of 129-20, so he gets an extraordinary amount of mop duty. He is The Other Ohtani, or at least that's how he should be marketed.

It was supposed to be a day to remember Chris Johnson, and it still can be. The NFL's all-time single-season yards leader was scheduled to be honored today by the Tennessee Titans, for whom he starred from 2008–13, at halftime of their game against the New York Jets, for whom he played in 2014. But the Titans announced Friday that Johnson won't be able to travel to Nashville to be inducted into the team's Ring of Honor, and the ceremony will be postponed to a later date. I hope it does happen later. Johnson's appearance was canceled due to "unforeseen circumstances," and it's hard not to assume that's health-related. Johnson, 40, revealed in June on Good Morning America that he's been diagnosed with amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, a degenerative neurological disorder that is invariably fatal. It is cruel and it works quickly: The average time between onset and death is between two and four years. Johnson said he first noticed weakness in one hand in March 2025, and by the time of his GMA interview just 15 months later, he required a computerized speech-generating device that he controls with his eye movements. A few days ago, Johnson published "A Letter to My Kids" in The Players' Tribune; it felt like a goodbye. "How can a man just be perfectly healthy one day," he wrote, "running around with his kids in the yard, and then the next, your hand starts getting weak, and it just travels throughout your whole body until you can’t talk anymore?"

The truest thing about college football is that there is no such thing as being too small, too petty, or too whiny about being too small or petty. We're not being frivolously critical here, despite how good doing that makes us feel; blaming people in the industry for acting out is like blaming a fish for being wet. These are simply the conditions that prevail. You simply have to learn to forget everything you ever learned about the values the sport allegedly respects, and take the mess it churns every week for the entertainment value. Which is why the resumption of the Kansas-Missouri football rivalry has gone so well for everyone involved, including those of us with no meat on the grill. Missouri won Friday’s game, 38-21, but it's the 8 at the end that stuck out, because that was Missouri coach Eli Drinkwitz directing his team to score a needless late touchdown and in doing so sticking one last finger in the Jayhawks' eye for bringing up the Bleeding Kansas crisis of the 1850s in a pregame hype video called, in a triumph of subtlety, "Heroes and Villains": https://twitter.com/KU_Football/status/2098169671824404786

Welcome to the Defector College Football Watch Guide, where Israel Daramola and Ray Ratto will tell you which of the weekend’s college football games are worth giving a crap about. Ray: With all the braying about the blessed return of football games this past week, all by people who should be constantly monitored for their protection and ours, we note that while there were many games, there was only some football. So far this season, ranked teams have beaten unranked teams by an aggregate score of 1,085-241, which is an average score of 45-10. (We are omitting the Mississippi-Louisville game since both teams were ranked and therefore treated the opener like the event it should be.) All the ranked teams won, with the neon-green asterisk being Michigan. Now we will ignore the elephantine questions of who got fired at Kalshi after paying out on Western Michigan bets, and who is the guiltiest party in the swindling of those deeply screwed Kalamazoomers. It has been six days since the discovery of the Big Ten's Mystery Clock, and in a culture like college football's, where cheating can be the difference between the Bluebonnet and Peach Bowls, most outrages this obvious barely last three days, let alone six. Instead, we will note that three games last weekend were delayed by the bestial weather, and a fourth, between the Colorado School of Mines Orediggers and Washburn Ichabods, became the first tie game in 31 years, because even after starting the game early to avoid a heat index figure straight from Satan's colon, the two schools went into overtime and couldn't finish. And really, can you pick a favorite between Orediggers and Ichabods? Anyway, let the sad tales commence.

Britt McHenry, a former Fox host and ESPN reporter best known for a towing-yard tirade, says she’s taken a job with the Trump administration. McHenry posted on social media Wednesday to confirm that she’d been hired as a “press advisor” for the U.S. Department of State. Her announcement, which was first reported by Barrett Media, included vague details about what her duties will be. She said she would be developing "strategies to address media concerns and enhance public understanding of State Department initiatives" on her updated LinkedIn page. But McHenry did say she’s "beyond excited" about working for Marco Rubio. It's unclear what part of McHenry's résumé makes her a good fit for the State Department. The tiny and harmful secretary of state has gotten recent attention for hiring folks who’ve been caught on video being assholes. If that's an attribute Rubio's indeed after, McHenry made an unbeatable audition tape more than a decade ago. In fact, should McHenry somehow go on to broker an end to the Iran fiasco, negotiate a truce in the Ukraine war, and formulate some sort of McHenry Doctrine that ushers in an era of world peace, here’s betting that her obituary would still lead off with what a loathsome bully she was in the spring of 2015 at a Northern Virginia towing yard.

This week on Nothing But Respect, we welcomed back million-time guest Giri Nathan to talk primarily about his experience covering the U.S. Open. How bad is the phone situation? How does the memetic object of the Honey Deuce explain the current predicament? What's been the match of the tournament? We also touched on the biggest NBA news story of the past week, as well as the fallout from the NBA's hammer-style punishment of the Clippers. You can find Nothing But Respect in Apple Podcasts or whatever podcast app you use. Follow the show on Instagram, and contact the Broke Jumper Tip Line at (347) 380-6426. Thanks for listening!

On Sept. 10, ProPublica published a story by reporter Gus Garcia-Roberts detailing how Pittsburgh Pirates center fielder Oneil Cruz avoided prosecution after a traffic collision in the Dominican Republic, in which he rear-ended a motorcycle, killing all three passengers. The crash occurred in Cruz's hometown of Nizao in the Peravia province, on Sept. 21, 2020; at the time, Cruz was 21 years old and still a prospect. While an initial press release from the public prosecutor's office stated that "according to investigations, the accused had ingested alcoholic beverages prior to the accident," prosecutors never raised the subject of either alcohol or intoxication at Cruz's arraignment. A Pittsburgh Post-Gazette article from five days after the crash reported on the discrepancy, with a spokeswoman from the public prosecutor's office stating that Cruz "smelled of alcohol," but due to a "procedural error," no official sobriety tests were performed. By the time Cruz was called up to the Pirates' big-league squad for the first time in 2021, the story was broadly forgotten. Garcia-Roberts's story details how Cruz came to face no charges related to the incident. Garcia-Roberts spoke to the families of the victims—19-year-old Daniela Perez Garcia, 20-year-old Deby Beato Charles, and 20-year-old Yohan Saba Mercado—all of whom withdrew their charges. According to his reporting, Cruz's family, while he was still in custody, reached out to Dominican businessman Santo Caraballo as a fixer, on the advice of a trainer. Caraballo, who had political connections, reportedly helped persuade the families of all the victims to accept a cash payment in exchange for withdrawing any legal claims against Cruz. In interviews, each family details the emotional fallout, and how they accepted the payments, which totaled roughly $66,000, due either to deceit, financial pressure, or pragmatism.

The power of a well and oft-told narrative is not to be diminished, but it also should not be feared if countervailing information comes to light. And so it is that the San Francisco 49ers, irradiated scoundrels though they may be and summer vacation wastrels they absolutely proved to be, came up with the one enduring rebuttal to all the amused schadenfreude that has been aimed their way. Specifically, they answered it with a comprehensive kicking of that arse. The 49ers put that indisputably goofy offseason all the way behind them—for a week, anyway—by taking the preseason Super Bowl favorite Los Angeles Rams and choke-slamming them and their national reputations on an Aussie Rules ground, 27-7. People made a point of saying afterward that this was the worst opening-game loss by a preseason championship favorite in 50 years, and it was. What this tells us is that all pregame gambling information, like almost all pregame information, has only one utility: to bait degenerates into spending money in defense of or repudiation of that information. The football stuff, by contrast, takes care of itself. The Rams, whose preseason standing was somewhere between consensus pick and indomitable favorite, never came close to proving it on Thursday. The score, for what it's worth, was probably a flattery to the Rams. The whompage was evident everywhere.

The NFL is built on parity. The middle exudes a tremendous gravitational force, with the schedule, the draft, and the salary cap all conspiring to pull every team toward 9-8 or 8-9 records year after year. While the larger-order churn of the league hews to that pattern, a number of teams have found ways to consistently defy the schematic, either by consistently posting winning records or failing to take advantage of the considerable structural help built into the way the NFL is organized. But why? What makes these organizations capable of resisting the pull of the middle? Joshua Robinson and Jonathan Clegg ask these questions in their new book, The Playbook: The Hidden Forces Shaping Winners and Losers in the Modern NFL, which is available now. This is the Wall Street Journal duo's fourth book together, and it's the product of a year of reporting and research. On Wednesday afternoon, I spoke with Robinson about the book's arguments, what makes team-building in the NFL so fascinating, and his and Clegg's co-writing process. Our conversation has been lightly edited for clarity.